While weed certainly makes some awkward situations tolerable, there are just as many – if not more – instances where it complicates them.
For example: A weekend with the in-laws may call for an eighth of Trainwreck and a lot of “business calls” taken outside in between “nature walks.”
But a six-hour seminar with your co-workers may, at the most, call for a beer at lunch. Not a bowl during intermission. That’s just the reality of being an adult with responsibilities.
Here are seven more uncomfortable situations where weed makes things worse:
1. When you’re on a blind date
It’s already weird – you don’t even know this person – but getting too stoned beforehand and losing your conversational edge could very well ruin your chances of getting laid and/or paving the way toward a relationship. Better to avoid the potential for a disastrous date … and a lonely night of Netflix.
2. When you’re interviewing for a job
Being nervous and all, you think a bowl will help. Nope. Even if you’re interviewing for a job at a legal weed store, showing up high will only make you look unprofessional, frivolous and irresponsible. Even if the other person can’t tell you’re stoned, you know you are, and you will not be able to perform at your optimal level.
More stoner life hacks
Staying strong: The seven habits of highly effective stoners
Marijuana life hacks: 10 tips to save any stoner’s day
Pros helping the newbies How to smoke weed for maximum enjoyment: Tips for first-timers
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3. When you’re in the middle of an argument
A reach for the peace pipe does not put an immediate end to an argument. If anything, it could set off the person with whom you’re arguing (whether it’s a spouse, partner or other family member), because they don’t think you’re taking them seriously. Instead, talk it out, listen attentively and try to find a middle ground.
4. When you get pulled over for a small offense
You would have gone home with a speeding ticket. Now you’re going to jail because your car smells like weed and there’s a blunt roach in your ashtray. The dank and driving just don’t mix.
5. When you’re the only person smoking weed at a party
You thought it would be cool with the host to spark up your J upon walking in the front door. But now you’re being asked to leave, having offended everyone in the party – and now getting the attention of the off-duty cop who just showed up. Yikes!
6. When you’re ordering food somewhere new and have no idea how the procedure goes
My first Chipotle visit a few years ago didn’t go so well. I was so stoned and confused at the ordering station that I panicked and asked for a soda, then left abruptly, quite embarrassed.
7. When you’re planning to break up with someone …
… but you’re too stoned to go through with it. So instead you eat too much and take her or him home anyway. And the next morning you’re kicking yourself when you get a text from the person you really want to be with it, but you can’t get rid of last night’s houseguest.